Mathieu Escande

Who writes this

One person. I write the rituals, the guides and the articles, and I build the app they live in. There is no editorial team behind that byline, and pretending otherwise would be the first small dishonesty in a product that asks couples to be honest with each other.

That has a cost worth naming. It means this site carries one point of view rather than a panel of them, and it means I am the person who gets things wrong. When I do, I would rather you knew who to hold to it.

Why I built it

I didn't lose my marriage in one moment. I lost it slowly, by not being there.

I was in the room. I wasn't present. I didn't really listen to my wife. I didn't understand what she needed from me, and I had never heard the words polarity or conscious touch. I thought love was something you feel, not something you practise. By the time I understood the difference, it was over.

My son was five. My daughter was three.

Nobody drifts on purpose. It happens in the ordinary gaps — the tired evenings, the half-listened answers, the months where you're both just managing. Two minutes of real attention a day would have changed my first family. I didn't know that. Nobody put it in my hands.

Children feel that distance too. They learn what love looks like from what they see at home. That is the part I think about most.

So I built the thing I wish someone had given me before it was too late. Small practices, done together, that keep two people turned toward each other. Not therapy. Not a test. Just a daily way back.

If it reaches one couple early enough — before the drifting becomes distance, and the distance becomes an ending — it was worth building.

What I am not

I am not a therapist, a counsellor, a psychologist or a doctor. I hold no clinical qualification, I do not treat anybody, and I do not want this site read as though I did.

That matters most at the edges. Rituals help with drift, tiredness, bad timing and the ordinary wear of a long relationship. They are the wrong tool for fear, control, betrayal, addiction, or conflict that does not feel safe — and in those situations the useful next step is a professional, not an app.

How I work

A ritual starts as something small I want to be true on a normal weeknight, not on a good day. I write it, keep it short enough to repeat when tired, and cut it until nothing is left that needs explaining.

Then it has to survive contact with real life. Anything that only works when both people are already in a good mood gets rewritten or dropped. The library is large because most of what I write does not make it through that, and the rest accumulates slowly.

Corrections and contact

If something here is wrong, unclear, or reads as a claim I have no business making, tell me and I will change it. That is a standing offer, not a formality.